Testing my Patience
Lately I find myself questioning my behaviour, my thoughts, my actions. I have been put into situations that are pushing my patience, my kindness, my attitudes. Let me explain.
Normally I am a very patient person. But as I am getting older and just in the last month, I feel like I get agitated more by waiting, by people who don’t seem to know their job and by people who are just outright unkind.
My hackles go up and I feel like retaliating.
I went to buy my mother a present in a very well-known branded shop. The first counter I went to, after waiting fifteen minutes and finding no one in sight, I moved to the next payment counter. There was a lady there already serving another customer, so I was happy to wait. The worker looked up at me, looked at what was in my hand and asked me to go to another counter without explanation.
Maybe she was going on lunch?
Maybe I was in the wrong department?
No matter the reason, my thoughts were not very good towards her.
I don’t know why she could not serve me, but I wandered further over to another counter, now getting grumpy.
There were two ladies here serving and there was only one customer, so I thought, “Yes, finally service.” I stood behind the customer. One of the ladies looked up and stated, “You need to go to one of the counters over there.” I exasperatingly stated that at the first counter no one was there, and I waited fifteen minutes and at the second counter the lady told me to go somewhere else. As I stopped for a breath of air……
The shopkeeper already serving the customer standing there, looked at me, looked at her assistant shopkeeper and looking back at me, said she would help me in a minute.
That was so nice of her!
But The Holy Spirit in my mind told me, not suggested, but told me – “Now behave Rosemary. It’s not these ladies fault that others were not there to serve or would not serve you.”
I blew out my exasperation and felt myself calm down. One of the main problems was I could only walk or stand for so long due to my health at the moment. But these people did not know this.
I also did not have to be unkind to them.
Just because I had other things going on in my life at the moment gave me no excuse to be impatient, unkind or judgmental of other people’s behaviour towards me.
This is where “the rubber hits the road,” as the saying goes.
When I am pushed into a corner, finding myself feeling impatient, having unkind thoughts of retaliation towards others who are mean to me, do I choose the right way to live? Jesus’ way. Or do I return the same behaviour that I have been receiving – an eye for an eye?
As you can see the Holy Spirit is working on my character, big time, at the moment. My secret places. For Jesus came to redeem everything about us. First, He saves and redeems us to receive this eternal life with Him. Then he continually works at making us holy, as white as snow, before Him. Gently, going deeper and deeper into us, into our secret places that need Jesus.
Where is the Holy Spirit “working” on you? Or are you pushing back against His Voice? Are you ignoring His tapping you on the shoulder? Are you even open to His “working” on your behaviours?
May these jottings from my journal inspire you to believe in and fall in love with Christ- the hope of the world, as stated in Jeremiah 17:7, ‘Blessed is the man who believes and trusts in and relies on the Lord and whose hope and confident expectation is the Lord!’
Love
Rosemary
Every week groups of ladies meet together to chat about the things I raise in my weekly blog post and to chat about life in general. We call these ‘Heart Connect’ groups.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
What scenarios have you lost your patience? Where you able to listen to the Holy Spirit in these moments?
Where is God currently building your character?
How are allowing God to refine you? Are you being open to it or shutting God out?