Checking on my Heart
Oh, a letter I just received from an acquaintance showed me that we do not know someone else’s journey, so be careful about judging others.
I thought that I had been dumped. A friendship that had started well just stopped. The friend seemed to have fallen off the face of the earth.
Well, she sort of really had. Her life on earth changed after she fell ill with Glandular Fever.
She had had it for a while before the doctors found what was causing the fatigue, the depression, the mood swings…..
Now I know some of these symptoms are not typical glandular fever ones, but the virus affected her pituitary gland and so all her hormone levels.
She was a different person. Her illness had changed her. Her illness affected her career. Her illness affected her marriage. Her illness affected all of her friendships. Not her fault, just something that had happened.
But I did not know any of this for about 4 months.
Sad to say I had had negative thoughts about her but once I knew why the silence on her end, The Holy Spirit sent me the mercy and compassion I was lacking and the reprimand of being negative towards her. This happened many years ago now, but it taught me a very important lesson.
We are all on a journey. Some people’s paths intersect with ours for just a time, for just a purpose designated by God. We need to have soft hearts, open to love and forgive.
We need to accept people no matter where they are. Jesus showed us this.
Remember the Woman caught in Adultery, and Jesus saved her by saying to the crowd made up of Pharisees, scribes, leaders and ordinary people,…
“Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”
John 8:7 NRSV
None of us can pick up a stone and throw it, for none of us are pure and holy and sinless. The only two humans on earth that were sinless were Jesus, being the Son of God, and Mary who was given this gift by God at her conception.
None of us can pick up a stone and throw it at anyone who has annoyed us, done wrong against us, dumped us, spoken bad about us etc etc because we all fall short of the Glory of God. Then everyone has a right to throw a stone back at us.
Maybe we have judged people too readily not knowing their story. Scripture does say, Let God be the judge in James 4:12.
Then on top of that we need to forgive and not hold a grudge.
Do you need to check your heart about judging others? I do.
May these jottings from my journal inspire you to believe in and fall in love with Christ- the hope of the world, as stated in Jeremiah 17:7, ‘Blessed is the man who believes and trusts in and relies on the Lord and whose hope and confident expectation is the Lord!’
Love
Rosemary
Every week groups of ladies meet together to chat about the things I raise in my weekly blog post and to chat about life in general. We call these ‘Heart Connect’ groups. If you would like more information please click HERE.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
Have there been times in your past where you have judged others than found out what their circumstances were?
Do you need to do check your heart to ensure it is soft, loving and forgiving toward others?
6 Comments
Valerie Lack
Yes, there have been times like that. Funnily enough, as a young child, just out from England and living in a small community, which at that time in the 1950s was considered living in the bush. I learned a valuable lesson. There was. A rather large family of about six children in this community and everyone criticised the mother for being lazy and putting the burden of the household on the eldest daughter who was around 11 years of age. One day the mother was found dead, she had a chronic heart problem. I remember thinking then, that people had been so cruel in their judgement of her.
I have also been guilty of judgement of the church, for the cruel abuse of children and the covering up of such heinous acts by those in church authority.
We are all so flawed and it is rather naive to assume every body else is pure and perfect, when I myself, am not.
Maria
Oh how easy it is for me to judge situations without knowing the full story. My mind races ahead and I let God slip out of my presence. Holy Spirit, give me that little nudge I need to rein in my mind and heart to see situations through Your eyes.
Rita
The timing of this message, is in itself, a moment to stop, be more patient, and less upset, in waiting
for a friend to contact me…..
I have grown up with a dear friend, who was like a sister to me. We have been good friends, through life’s turbulence and supportive of one another, throughout the good and especially, through the more difficult times.
As her marriage fell apart, and other personal issues presented, I did my best to support her, at all times with honesty and sincerity.
Sometimes it is better not to offer guidance.
No matter how well intended, it is not always so.
Over time, my friend developed new friendships, (which is perfectly ok). Sometimes though, I feel excluded and perhaps, only best to talk to, during a crisis!….
The regular chats have stopped.
I am more likely to receive a text than a call.
Despite my efforts, I feel sad, and yes, even angry
at myself, for trying to keep the lines of communication open.
I feel ready to ‘just let things be.’
As my dear mother would say; ‘ Give it to God’
This message has reminded me, continue praying, especially during pain and injury.
God has a life purpose for everyone, including;
a beginning and exit, of friendships,
family and a life we once knew.
I pray the Holy Spirit will help me to move forward, gently, and accept what is and what will be.
Maria
Wise words from your mother Rita. I pray that God will soften and heal your heart.
Cheryl
There’s a quote “Everyone you meet is a part of your journey. Some people are just passing through to bring you gifts; either they’re blessings or lessons”. Another one: “People come into your life fo a reason, a season or a lifetime.”
Valerie Simms
Thank you for sharing with us your personal experiences of hurts, disappointments and judgements Rosemary. I want to respond when I can reflect upon my own personal experiences more deeply, This is going to take time for me to do Rosemary and all you ladies who shared from the heart . I thank you all for sharing and I will come back and share also!
In Christ’s Love
Valerie